Nov 19, 2007
todo me lo enseno...
...la viborita que vive en mi casa, aquella que algunos han visto sobre la sala, un poco maltratada por el paso del tiempo y tantos lugares en los que ha estado a mi lado. Su origen es uno muy curioso, era el mes de enero de 1999, el dia no lo puedo recordar, simplemente porque en enero solo importa un dia, 1 de enero, que es mi cumpleanos; iba por la calle en un barrio al norte de Madero tamaulipas, un chico que en aquel entonces me adoraba me habia regalado unas geodas, de esas piedras de aspecto tosco exterior que esconden en su interior un tesoro de cristales de cuarzo. Estaba caminando sin fijarme por donde caminaba, cosa que pense que desapareceria con la edad, en fin ahi voy y me tropiezo con un cordon de una banqueta, ya sabes el puro cordon, que despues todos los vecinos rompen para hacer la banqueta que se ajuste a sus necesidades y haciendo el trote cada dia mas riesgoso y hasta la costera miguel aleman esta asi... en fin! soy medio distraido, y donde he caido con una mitad de la piedra en cada mano, justo enfrente de mis manos, una serpiente, cuando levante la mirada a ver si las piedras estaban bien, porque a mi no me habia pasado nada, me di cuenta de que muy cerca de mis manos estaba la cabeza de una serpiente que -disculpas- no es nada bonita, amarilla con rayas verdes, pero cuando movi las manos me di cuenta que no me habia visto, seguia hipnotizada por el brillo de las piedras, estaba como en trance, luz entrando por sus ojos y fluyendo con la piedra, luz iba y venia y cuando me levante la serpiente enfurecida se lanzo tras de mi, intente correr y se me cayo una piedra y ahi la serpiente quedo de nuevo, ligera como el aire, fuera y muy dentro de si, pero como no me iba a perder de mi piedra, aproveche su distraccion, y tome una tablita que estaba por ahi, y a mi mas personal version de un corte vertical samurai le di justo detras de la cabeza, una herida le hice el equivalente ovideo de la nuca, pero no estaba muerta, seguia aferrada a la vision de la piedra y a decir verdad, la piedra es bastante barata, pero tal vez tenia algo del amor con el que llego a mis manos, no lo podia entender, como era posible? me detuve a ver mi piedra y el brillo se estaba opacando, pero la que seguia frente a la viborita, seguia viva, tenia su propio rayo de sol. Todo esto sucedia a mi alrededor al mismo tiempo que carros iban y venian, cambiaban de direccion en la esquina, el senor de los quesos llegaba con su encargo semana a las casas, lalo subia a su habitacion contento de haberme visto sonreir con mi regalo, un avion pasaba por el cielo, el tren a la distancia se escuchaba encaminarse a las plantas en altamira, habia ruido de pierdas saltando, porque un vecino estaba 'ajustando' su banqueta y un senor que vendia viboritas chinas de madera cegado por el sol en su busqueda del avion que zurcaba los cielos, tropezo contra mi y dejo sus ramilletes de viboritas de madera que traia en una mano para soportar la caida y sin soltar los globos que seguramente escaparina al menor error, en la confusion yo solo queria encontrar mi piedrita, saber donde seguia la vibora y el senor levantaba con una mano las que podian y por ultimo quedaba una viborita con rayas verdes, como aquella que ahora no podia encontrar y parecio un milagro, la vibora real, ya no estaba, solo aquella replica exacta en madera y seguia aun mirando a la piedra. De inmediato y sin temor, me agache a recojerla y mientras la veia entendi que debia llevarla a casa, no sabia que poder, pero esta vibora habia hecho una acto milagroso para tener la oportunidad de seguir contemplando el interior luminoso de mis geodas y yo seria su guardian y nuna jamas dejaria que sus ojos no miraran la belleza de las piedras, camine a mi casa en total asombro y una sonrisa de esas que aun puedo recordar y repetir. Desde entonces, la vibora me acompano durante mis estudios universitarios en Monterrey, donde porsupuesto, sabia ella y avido espectador de Animal Planet decidi colocarla siempre en un lugar donde me pudiera vigilar y pudiera ver aunque sea un reflejo de las geodas. Se mudo conmigo a todas partes donde he estado, incluso algunas veces me ha acompanado en pequenos viajes. Trato de que siempre le de el sol, por eso de la costumbre de los seres de sangre fria. Anoche, noviembre 18, platicaba por msn con una vecina de aquel chico que me regalo las geodas, nos encontramos por casualidad usando una pagina donde puedes interactura con coumindades virtuales... en la platica me saludo su mama, que dice que siempre me recordara, por aquel vendedor que me tumbo frente a su casa al que por cierto, que ironia, vendia vivoras y alli mero, frente a su casa, una lo mordio.
Jun 5, 2007
r u gay?
A few days ago the time stopped for a moment while I was walking and a sweet voice suddenly asked, ‘Are you gay?’ I was at a good friend’s house and the person asking had known that I was gay for a bit more than a minute. I was not in drag, and she barely saw me so I had to do what silly people do, reply with a question, ‘what did you say?!’ she apologized and said she did not know anything about gay either, and considering she did not get the humour of the situation she was getting into, I can say she was not a good thermometer, yet she made me realize that I do no know what GAY means, in terms of homosexuality, and tags are never fun, unless you bare HOT, SINGLE, BILLIONARE and WELL ENDOWED, altogether.
So it brought and ancient question to my mind… who am I?
It is too boring I am going to stop.
So it brought and ancient question to my mind… who am I?
It is too boring I am going to stop.
Home...to Luisito and Katia
There are places in this world that somehow manage themselves to take your breath away. That is the case of my parents’ house a place located in downtown Mante, Tamaulipas. It is a good size property located in a corner, the advantage of living in a corner is that instead of having the next door and in-front neighbours you got plenty more and so it creates a circuit interrupted by traffic, which ends up being the disadvantage when something’s up, there are more eyes and ears to be taken care of. All the traffic and numerous accidents have left a very strange vibe going on; I grew up on this corner, Paniagua and Clavijero, and if it was not enough, my father opened a little store there, so add more people to the salad, despite that, the place is quiet and windy, blistering hot in the summer and freezing cold in the winter week. The almond trees in the area are THE place to nest for little birds, the brown ones we all know. I love their singing and so they love the food my mother provides; every once in a while a hock or an eagle or even a possum come here for lunch.
Since I left, when I was fourteen, I can recall every occasion I returned. Not plenty obviously and less and less it is. Fausto and Franka guard the house, noble stud and bitch, are quite noisy when required and peaceful clowns when in need of attention. The afternoon wind moves the leaves of the trees and so a charming sound begins, no cars, no motorcycles it is peaceful and quiet, I am in Neverland.
The drapes dance to the wind flow, the birds sing and the dogs look at you wondering when something is going to happen. Nothing ever happens, never at this time, amazing, the town sleeps and nature blooms. The sunset begins and the colours in the sky change from deep blue, to soft lilac and then to bright orange, then all the purples come and fade to darkness. Long clouds cross the sky; pink, yellow, red and purple are the colours of the season…suddenly the wind stops and you hear nothing but whispers, we all wait for the wind to return and so it does, it is like a spasm, like arrhythmia, then we all smile again. It’s magical, looking at the trees and watching them dance. If you look carefully you can see the birds going back to the nest with food for their offspring, the ants march towards their hole, the lizards appear looking for the soft sunset light to warm them up a little.
Finally, the cars return, the noise is not that much, and so I close the windows, light the garden and my mother brings fresh fruit from the kitchen. We love to eat, and we love to eat in good company. Plums, peaches, grapes and mangos on the table, fresh flowers are presented to make my little sister present when she is not available to come and visit. The family has changed; two members are not there, we do not even talk about them, as my older sister and my self become single again. Men go to the patio and discuss important stuff, soccer games, soccer players drafting, soccer coaches, national soccer team, national soccer team coach, mafia, politics, religion and of course I bring the gay point of view, everybody seems ok with it, a different opinion and it is welcome. Three year old Andrea G. comes out of the house and her sweet little voice announces dinner is on the table. Sopes, tostadas and taquidos, water and coca-cola (light and zero) are on the table, I push play to hear a disc of Huapangos, and then we all sit at the table, a few of us close our eyes for two or three seconds to whisper ‘Thank you God’. Ever since the Narcos and the Zetas have taken control of the state, and have somehow threatened my family’s stability, all music from Sinaloa, Durango or even Nuevo León has been banished from our house.
Katia M. and Luis M. (Niece and Nephew) were not there and that makes you realize how important they are for us, we miss you guys, I know you are fine with your father, and still breaks my heart.
Since I left, when I was fourteen, I can recall every occasion I returned. Not plenty obviously and less and less it is. Fausto and Franka guard the house, noble stud and bitch, are quite noisy when required and peaceful clowns when in need of attention. The afternoon wind moves the leaves of the trees and so a charming sound begins, no cars, no motorcycles it is peaceful and quiet, I am in Neverland.
The drapes dance to the wind flow, the birds sing and the dogs look at you wondering when something is going to happen. Nothing ever happens, never at this time, amazing, the town sleeps and nature blooms. The sunset begins and the colours in the sky change from deep blue, to soft lilac and then to bright orange, then all the purples come and fade to darkness. Long clouds cross the sky; pink, yellow, red and purple are the colours of the season…suddenly the wind stops and you hear nothing but whispers, we all wait for the wind to return and so it does, it is like a spasm, like arrhythmia, then we all smile again. It’s magical, looking at the trees and watching them dance. If you look carefully you can see the birds going back to the nest with food for their offspring, the ants march towards their hole, the lizards appear looking for the soft sunset light to warm them up a little.
Finally, the cars return, the noise is not that much, and so I close the windows, light the garden and my mother brings fresh fruit from the kitchen. We love to eat, and we love to eat in good company. Plums, peaches, grapes and mangos on the table, fresh flowers are presented to make my little sister present when she is not available to come and visit. The family has changed; two members are not there, we do not even talk about them, as my older sister and my self become single again. Men go to the patio and discuss important stuff, soccer games, soccer players drafting, soccer coaches, national soccer team, national soccer team coach, mafia, politics, religion and of course I bring the gay point of view, everybody seems ok with it, a different opinion and it is welcome. Three year old Andrea G. comes out of the house and her sweet little voice announces dinner is on the table. Sopes, tostadas and taquidos, water and coca-cola (light and zero) are on the table, I push play to hear a disc of Huapangos, and then we all sit at the table, a few of us close our eyes for two or three seconds to whisper ‘Thank you God’. Ever since the Narcos and the Zetas have taken control of the state, and have somehow threatened my family’s stability, all music from Sinaloa, Durango or even Nuevo León has been banished from our house.
Katia M. and Luis M. (Niece and Nephew) were not there and that makes you realize how important they are for us, we miss you guys, I know you are fine with your father, and still breaks my heart.
Another reason for gay marriage
It was the fall of 2004, don not picture it with red leaves falling everywhere because it was in Monterrey, Mexico, where fall is a continuation of spring, but rainy and cold. I fell in love with a man, who was and still is, caring and loving, smart and hard worker, handsome and strong. It was internet love, what many people believe can not be trusted, but guess what, in the gay community it is very popular and it has also spread to the heterosexual community all over the glove. International love has grown faster than the global love for LV bags, which took decades. He asked me to come live with him to Toronto, Canada, and after thinking it over a thousand times I said yes. Ups and downs came; happiness was there at times, just like any other relationship. We were getting to know each other on the road, it was good, and seemed to fit perfect for the kind of people we are. We liked to walk to path, happiness is about the journey and all that stuff. I was looking for stability, my then partner was not. He never got tired of new experiences and drew me into it, at the beginning it was perfect, new stuff of all kinds, until he tried to experience things that would not make me proud. He used drugs to get me in the mood and get away with his thing. That created hate but I still loved him and I thought he had a problem with drugs, I was the one with problem of not letting go what was not good for me. Beating, cheating, crying, a self destructing relationship was born and I was caught in the tide. When absolutely nothing went well, and I was formally asked to get out of his life for the third time, I left.
And I left destroyed, I left sad, miserable, and with very few intentions to keep going on. My magic castle had fallen off the spell and so reality hit me. I looked for shelter in my friend Sandra, who was going through a break up process, and she thought I was going through the same, she helped a lot and so did my friend Rolando, an eternal lover. That was my support team. And they did great, I got to see through them that I had been there and done that and that where I stood had been something bigger than words can describe. It did not work for me.
I was going to see my family and my sister was going for her divorce, because the guy she married was unable to ‘make her happy’ her way.
I refused to believe I was living a soap opera, but I was indeed. I was alone, nobody would take the gay break-up talk, it is a myth, gay man cannot fall in love the way men and women do. If they break-up, they get on their fit the next day because the fantasy is over and that’s it. They do not have to go through the legal process and split property, or children or friends. They do not have to break a public commitment celebrated at church and with legal validation in front of hundreds of well dressed people. You gay man, broke up? Big deal!
We had life together, dreams, goals and many things more. My parents could not believe I was sad! Com’on you are dudes! You have a new job, you have your favourite pet, yes kept the others and gave them up to some body else, big deal! You left home with three bags full with clothes and no more, of course you got more than what you earned and spent! I tried to be discrete but next time I will flaunt it!
My spirit is not broken, my heart is, it will heal, soon or not so soon, but It will. My heart is now covered with this black shield called bitterness, like Spiderman and all those feelings will be kept inside. Had it been public and different, had I had the chance I would have not traded it for nothing. At least people would understand that gay love, please call it love, could as well hurt, a lot.
And I left destroyed, I left sad, miserable, and with very few intentions to keep going on. My magic castle had fallen off the spell and so reality hit me. I looked for shelter in my friend Sandra, who was going through a break up process, and she thought I was going through the same, she helped a lot and so did my friend Rolando, an eternal lover. That was my support team. And they did great, I got to see through them that I had been there and done that and that where I stood had been something bigger than words can describe. It did not work for me.
I was going to see my family and my sister was going for her divorce, because the guy she married was unable to ‘make her happy’ her way.
I refused to believe I was living a soap opera, but I was indeed. I was alone, nobody would take the gay break-up talk, it is a myth, gay man cannot fall in love the way men and women do. If they break-up, they get on their fit the next day because the fantasy is over and that’s it. They do not have to go through the legal process and split property, or children or friends. They do not have to break a public commitment celebrated at church and with legal validation in front of hundreds of well dressed people. You gay man, broke up? Big deal!
We had life together, dreams, goals and many things more. My parents could not believe I was sad! Com’on you are dudes! You have a new job, you have your favourite pet, yes kept the others and gave them up to some body else, big deal! You left home with three bags full with clothes and no more, of course you got more than what you earned and spent! I tried to be discrete but next time I will flaunt it!
My spirit is not broken, my heart is, it will heal, soon or not so soon, but It will. My heart is now covered with this black shield called bitterness, like Spiderman and all those feelings will be kept inside. Had it been public and different, had I had the chance I would have not traded it for nothing. At least people would understand that gay love, please call it love, could as well hurt, a lot.
Ali-baba's cave
This morning I was left alone again, and so I decided to explore this property, that has not received a name yet, but is known as La Casa de Tus Papás by my in-laws.
My mother -and this runs in the family- has a problem with physical attachment to things, people and animals. My father decided to build an annex where things would be ordered and stored, filing cabinets and because you might spend a little while there he also added a bathroom. When some relatives come to visit they ask for that annex to be set up as a bedroom, because it can be quite an experience, it is extremely private and fresh most of the year and warm in the winter week, which in Mante is rare. It is now getting messy, because it stores stuff for three generations and my nieces and nephews are very good examples of mass consumption, yet the oldest is 10 years old.
I decided to go there, I call it Ali-Baba’s cave because it is dark and once you light it up and look carefully, you can see treasures. It was completed 4 years ago, it also responds to the growing distances between my parents and where their children were; and I will describe some of the things found here. If I survive both my parents, when they are both gone (knock on wood) this place will hold the hundred years fight, unless somebody moves in here and… no, a fight will definitely take place there.
The first armchair my parents bought is there, we are talking when they got married, 37 years ago and they lived in Acapulco. Next to that is a pile of wood boxes, beginning with the 50’s each box represents a decade of my father’s hobby-no-more, Ms. Photography, so yes, all those embarrassing pictures, naked babies, faces covered in cake icing, cakes, Christmases, new years, graduation –even if it was from kindergarten- christenings, confirmations, first communions, XV años, weddings, passed relatives, my father getting his offspring drunk, him smoking (!), former boyfriends and girlfriends, presents given to my father – lamb, baby pigs, turkeys, veal- and so on and so forth are there.
Do you remember those silly colouring books that you screwed up using only the black Crayola? Baby teeth? Baby Shoes? The candles you lit when you did your first communion? Your oldest sister’s first bra? Your oldest brother’s first Play Boy Magazine featuring LaToya Jackson? Your Boy Scout gear? Somebody’s weird and cheap gay magazine? Your Cepillin record? The winnie-pooh you cried for when it would not stick to the car window anymore? Your crystal growing Mi Alegría kit? A 7.8 kilos IBM think pad? A map of all dead pets buried in the garden with pictures of them on it? A very good Venustiano Carranza beard wore on a Mexican Revolution parade? Sea shells from all beaches in the republic? Fresh water Shells? Shells from deserts? Shells from stores? Star fish from the Gulf of Mexico? Star fish from the pacific? Star fish from the Caribbean? One of Pamela’s exoskeleton –fangs included-? A 35 year old baby Jesus and his substitutes? Your first microphone? A black and white portable radio-alarm-tv? Garibaldi, José José, Yuri, Calo, Air Supply, Rick Astley, Enrique Rocha cassettes? Flutes? Guitars? Cowboy boots and hats? Your cedar crib? Your cedar bed with the original bed head? Official Mexican Flag? PRI paraphernalia? Clothes from 5 decades? Accessories like sun glasses, hats, shoes, gloves, necklaces, earrings? French dolls? Japanese dolls? An army of Barbie’s? Hot Wheels? Care bears? Trompos? Baleros? Dominos? Home made Resorteras? 12 sets of Turista Mundial? Foot ball? Volley Ball? Your first tennis racquet? Trophies? Medals? Diplomas? Two versions of the Bible? Qumran? Chilam-Balam? Popol Vuh? Quixote? Octavio Paz’s, García Marquez’s, Pellicer’s and Villaurrutia’s complete Opuses? Suite cases filled with souvenirs and postcards? My three siblings’ weddings centrepieces –which can be used anytime, just get fresh flowers-? Fossils? Rocks? Quartzes? Dried leaves? Dried flowers? Feathers? A picture of a red, green and purple chick –that turned into real hens and then eaten covered in Mole-? A picture of a two headed cow? Mugs from theme parks? Tequila shot glasses? Atari? Nintendo? Betamax? Guns that look like jewellery? ... I will keep looking around!
My mother -and this runs in the family- has a problem with physical attachment to things, people and animals. My father decided to build an annex where things would be ordered and stored, filing cabinets and because you might spend a little while there he also added a bathroom. When some relatives come to visit they ask for that annex to be set up as a bedroom, because it can be quite an experience, it is extremely private and fresh most of the year and warm in the winter week, which in Mante is rare. It is now getting messy, because it stores stuff for three generations and my nieces and nephews are very good examples of mass consumption, yet the oldest is 10 years old.
I decided to go there, I call it Ali-Baba’s cave because it is dark and once you light it up and look carefully, you can see treasures. It was completed 4 years ago, it also responds to the growing distances between my parents and where their children were; and I will describe some of the things found here. If I survive both my parents, when they are both gone (knock on wood) this place will hold the hundred years fight, unless somebody moves in here and… no, a fight will definitely take place there.
The first armchair my parents bought is there, we are talking when they got married, 37 years ago and they lived in Acapulco. Next to that is a pile of wood boxes, beginning with the 50’s each box represents a decade of my father’s hobby-no-more, Ms. Photography, so yes, all those embarrassing pictures, naked babies, faces covered in cake icing, cakes, Christmases, new years, graduation –even if it was from kindergarten- christenings, confirmations, first communions, XV años, weddings, passed relatives, my father getting his offspring drunk, him smoking (!), former boyfriends and girlfriends, presents given to my father – lamb, baby pigs, turkeys, veal- and so on and so forth are there.
Do you remember those silly colouring books that you screwed up using only the black Crayola? Baby teeth? Baby Shoes? The candles you lit when you did your first communion? Your oldest sister’s first bra? Your oldest brother’s first Play Boy Magazine featuring LaToya Jackson? Your Boy Scout gear? Somebody’s weird and cheap gay magazine? Your Cepillin record? The winnie-pooh you cried for when it would not stick to the car window anymore? Your crystal growing Mi Alegría kit? A 7.8 kilos IBM think pad? A map of all dead pets buried in the garden with pictures of them on it? A very good Venustiano Carranza beard wore on a Mexican Revolution parade? Sea shells from all beaches in the republic? Fresh water Shells? Shells from deserts? Shells from stores? Star fish from the Gulf of Mexico? Star fish from the pacific? Star fish from the Caribbean? One of Pamela’s exoskeleton –fangs included-? A 35 year old baby Jesus and his substitutes? Your first microphone? A black and white portable radio-alarm-tv? Garibaldi, José José, Yuri, Calo, Air Supply, Rick Astley, Enrique Rocha cassettes? Flutes? Guitars? Cowboy boots and hats? Your cedar crib? Your cedar bed with the original bed head? Official Mexican Flag? PRI paraphernalia? Clothes from 5 decades? Accessories like sun glasses, hats, shoes, gloves, necklaces, earrings? French dolls? Japanese dolls? An army of Barbie’s? Hot Wheels? Care bears? Trompos? Baleros? Dominos? Home made Resorteras? 12 sets of Turista Mundial? Foot ball? Volley Ball? Your first tennis racquet? Trophies? Medals? Diplomas? Two versions of the Bible? Qumran? Chilam-Balam? Popol Vuh? Quixote? Octavio Paz’s, García Marquez’s, Pellicer’s and Villaurrutia’s complete Opuses? Suite cases filled with souvenirs and postcards? My three siblings’ weddings centrepieces –which can be used anytime, just get fresh flowers-? Fossils? Rocks? Quartzes? Dried leaves? Dried flowers? Feathers? A picture of a red, green and purple chick –that turned into real hens and then eaten covered in Mole-? A picture of a two headed cow? Mugs from theme parks? Tequila shot glasses? Atari? Nintendo? Betamax? Guns that look like jewellery? ... I will keep looking around!
Jun 4, 2007
le muevo la panza por una ayuda?
Si, definitivamente el peso paso de moda, ahora es por una ayuda, digamos que el costo de la vida en Acapulco ha subido. Tengo el temor de adoptar el acento, Dios protegeme del acento costeño tanto como me proteges de mis enemigos.
Ya llegué, ya estoy aquí y el domingo pasado salí a caminar por la costera M. Alemán, y dos niños al unisono me recitaron cierta poesía que incluia "le muevo la panza" y terminaba en "para comprar el pan"! les di unos pesos por la bienvenida y enseguida vi a un señor en huaraches y calcetas blancas... finalmente me cayo el 20, estaba en Acapulco.
Día con día me voy adaptando mas a mi trabajo, mis reponsabilidad y mi vida en este puerto, que aunque bello, muestra un retraso impresionante comparado con otras áreas resort del país. Al parecer esta mejorando, pero aun no ha llegado el verdadero cambio y no tengo nada en contra de los amarillos... pero por el bien de la ciudad en la que hora vivo, les deseo éxito para todos.
La prueba mas grande de haberme mudado a esta ciudad es empezar una nueva vida, de crecimiento y éxito. Los ultimos meses han estado cargados de mucha energía emocional negativa que me ha dejado agotado de las presiones de los egos ajenos. Intolerante es como me defino y mi visión de lo que quiero y lo que no se ha ampliado.
Aunque suene a broma a mis 25, después de cerrar un círculo tan definitivo en mi vida y con un nuevo trabajo, las cosas se presentan mas claras, el horizonte es mas amplio y la necesidad y el deseo han cambiado de posiciones. La capacidad de voltear y mirar al pasado y entender y aceptar la responsabilidad de tus actos, es una posibilidad siempre abierta, toma una experiencia que te cambie la vida para darte el valor de hacerlo, siempre ha estado ahí tu pasado, que no puede ser mejor maestro para conocerte y mejorar algo si sientes que así se puede hacer.
Dios me ha llenado de bendiciones, y de verdad no me puedo quejar, tienes que aprender a tomar las cosas buenas del camino de la vida...
Por otra parte Turquía me ha tomado por sorpresa y aunque no es desierto, me ha brindado un oasis.
Mi depa esta muy padre y Teddy es feliz con este calor, quiero aprovechar para agradecerle a Rolando por todo el apoyo y a Sandrita por su hospitalidad, nunca lo voy a olvidar.
Y si quieren escuchar a los vengaboys en un antro, ver hombres en huaraches y calcetas blancas... este es el lugar!
God Speed!
Ya llegué, ya estoy aquí y el domingo pasado salí a caminar por la costera M. Alemán, y dos niños al unisono me recitaron cierta poesía que incluia "le muevo la panza" y terminaba en "para comprar el pan"! les di unos pesos por la bienvenida y enseguida vi a un señor en huaraches y calcetas blancas... finalmente me cayo el 20, estaba en Acapulco.
Día con día me voy adaptando mas a mi trabajo, mis reponsabilidad y mi vida en este puerto, que aunque bello, muestra un retraso impresionante comparado con otras áreas resort del país. Al parecer esta mejorando, pero aun no ha llegado el verdadero cambio y no tengo nada en contra de los amarillos... pero por el bien de la ciudad en la que hora vivo, les deseo éxito para todos.
La prueba mas grande de haberme mudado a esta ciudad es empezar una nueva vida, de crecimiento y éxito. Los ultimos meses han estado cargados de mucha energía emocional negativa que me ha dejado agotado de las presiones de los egos ajenos. Intolerante es como me defino y mi visión de lo que quiero y lo que no se ha ampliado.
Aunque suene a broma a mis 25, después de cerrar un círculo tan definitivo en mi vida y con un nuevo trabajo, las cosas se presentan mas claras, el horizonte es mas amplio y la necesidad y el deseo han cambiado de posiciones. La capacidad de voltear y mirar al pasado y entender y aceptar la responsabilidad de tus actos, es una posibilidad siempre abierta, toma una experiencia que te cambie la vida para darte el valor de hacerlo, siempre ha estado ahí tu pasado, que no puede ser mejor maestro para conocerte y mejorar algo si sientes que así se puede hacer.
Dios me ha llenado de bendiciones, y de verdad no me puedo quejar, tienes que aprender a tomar las cosas buenas del camino de la vida...
Por otra parte Turquía me ha tomado por sorpresa y aunque no es desierto, me ha brindado un oasis.
Mi depa esta muy padre y Teddy es feliz con este calor, quiero aprovechar para agradecerle a Rolando por todo el apoyo y a Sandrita por su hospitalidad, nunca lo voy a olvidar.
Y si quieren escuchar a los vengaboys en un antro, ver hombres en huaraches y calcetas blancas... este es el lugar!
God Speed!
Apr 20, 2007
Rough minute
There is attitude in this world ladies and gentleman; that is what history is all about, the attitude of the writer, that is what love is all about as well, the attitude to accept love, the willingness to commit, the attitude to face a broken heart.
For the last two years and a little of this one, I lived what I once thought was only possible in my dreams. That feeling of completeness, light within you, love, God’s love spotlight above you, it was unbelievable how good if felt, you can try, but no matter if the Pope died (John Paul II), you just can’t stop smiling, and the light in your eyes dazzles you in the mirror, the morning sun is like Olympic-closure-ceremony fireworks; out the window the birds sing and you can imagine, as taught in Sunday school, that there are angels all around you singing, smiling, cute little faces of light. Even the squirrels come to you when you offer anything, the can see you need nothing but to give back a little of all that much love you have. The most sacred Buda covered in purple light and surrounded by good spirits; when the phone rings the smile goes wider and you did not actually walk towards it, you flew to where the speaker was, and perhaps the brain could not register those steps. Starry sky on the ceiling every night, full moon every evening; you drop invisible coins with your smile to the homeless, you hear children asking their moms, why is that guy shimmering? No matter where you stand you glow, I was like a pregnant young man in the crowd. Baseballs would come to my hands unasked, bouquets would travel on the wrong direction to fall on my lap, you name it, and I got it. I couldn’t have it all; I never won the lotto, although in my lucky spree I never missed a single Friday draw. There was a sunny winter and a cool summer, the most spectacular fall and 10,000 tulips bloomed at our feet in Vancouver for spring. Put anything on the frying pan and it’s a feast! Saw a seed and watch it grow like magic beans, even Mexican jumping beans came with a rehearsed choreography, they had to compete! Cats became as loyal and giving as dogs, and they shit in a sand box; friends were shared and a new family was born. Wild Juniper in the air all the time, orchids showing off their beauty, in the middle of the desert! Falling asleep next to each other, waking up the same way
An ‘Alchemist’ warming the winter, feeling proud and whistling Choo Choo! to the crowd, staying with Queen E, gorgeous dieing clowns, dancing with Lola and drinking with Rico, mastering Davie St., walking on the strip, having sourdough at the Warf, looking at the Angel, close called by the desert, drinking on water and Jesus embracing me as his gay son…
Good stories have an ending, great ones don’t.
For the last two years and a little of this one, I lived what I once thought was only possible in my dreams. That feeling of completeness, light within you, love, God’s love spotlight above you, it was unbelievable how good if felt, you can try, but no matter if the Pope died (John Paul II), you just can’t stop smiling, and the light in your eyes dazzles you in the mirror, the morning sun is like Olympic-closure-ceremony fireworks; out the window the birds sing and you can imagine, as taught in Sunday school, that there are angels all around you singing, smiling, cute little faces of light. Even the squirrels come to you when you offer anything, the can see you need nothing but to give back a little of all that much love you have. The most sacred Buda covered in purple light and surrounded by good spirits; when the phone rings the smile goes wider and you did not actually walk towards it, you flew to where the speaker was, and perhaps the brain could not register those steps. Starry sky on the ceiling every night, full moon every evening; you drop invisible coins with your smile to the homeless, you hear children asking their moms, why is that guy shimmering? No matter where you stand you glow, I was like a pregnant young man in the crowd. Baseballs would come to my hands unasked, bouquets would travel on the wrong direction to fall on my lap, you name it, and I got it. I couldn’t have it all; I never won the lotto, although in my lucky spree I never missed a single Friday draw. There was a sunny winter and a cool summer, the most spectacular fall and 10,000 tulips bloomed at our feet in Vancouver for spring. Put anything on the frying pan and it’s a feast! Saw a seed and watch it grow like magic beans, even Mexican jumping beans came with a rehearsed choreography, they had to compete! Cats became as loyal and giving as dogs, and they shit in a sand box; friends were shared and a new family was born. Wild Juniper in the air all the time, orchids showing off their beauty, in the middle of the desert! Falling asleep next to each other, waking up the same way
An ‘Alchemist’ warming the winter, feeling proud and whistling Choo Choo! to the crowd, staying with Queen E, gorgeous dieing clowns, dancing with Lola and drinking with Rico, mastering Davie St., walking on the strip, having sourdough at the Warf, looking at the Angel, close called by the desert, drinking on water and Jesus embracing me as his gay son…
Good stories have an ending, great ones don’t.
Mar 7, 2007
Feb 14, 2007
Lova ya'll!
(Clearing my throat to write)... here we are, back to one of the most terrible day's in human history, and it comes around every year. ”Disastrous!” “Awful!” “Not my kind of day!” “I hate Valentine's day!” We hear that from our loved ones who do not feel the love... is not that they cannot feel it, is just that they need a stronger level of it... nobody's responsibility! Terrible things in history have happened on the 45th day of the Gregorian calendar and here are some examples:
Events
1349 - Approximately 2,000 Jews were burned to death by mobs in Strasbourg and expelled from the city. (I do respect people, not Jews or Muslims or Catholics because from the outside is hard to get… get it?)
1779 - James Cook was killed by Native Hawaiians near Kealakekua on the Island of Hawaii. (He took away their innocence!)
1835 - The original Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, is formed in Kirtland, Ohio. (Good lord!)
1876 - Alexander Graham Bell applies for a patent for the telephone, as does Elisha Gray. (Carlos Slim says thank you!)
1879 - The War of the Pacific breaks out when Chilean armed forces occupy the Bolivian port city of Antofagasta. (it’s true!)
1895 - First performance of Oscar Wilde's last play The Importance of Being Earnest at the St James's Theatre in London. (Go Oscar… then suffer!)
1900 - Russia responds to international pressure to free Finland by tightening imperial control over the country. (Reason why Finland vodka is not as good as it should be had they stayed Russian… but they are first world now… go figure)
1918 - Tarzan of the Apes, the first movie featuring Edgar Rice Burroughs' Tarzan character, is released. (ever wonder why the jungle is endangered?)
1918 - The Soviet Union adopts the Gregorian calendar (1 February according to the Julian calendar). (weakness)
1920 - The League of Women Voters is founded in Chicago, Illinois. (Jesus! Joseph! and…)
1924 - The International Business Machines Corporation (IBM) is founded. (Let’s go GLOBAL)
1929 - St. Valentine's Day Massacre: Seven gangster rivals of Al Capone are murdered in Chicago, Illinois. (it’s all said and yes, done)
1945 - President Franklin D. Roosevelt meets with King Ibn Saud of Saudi Arabia aboard the USS Quincy, officially starting the U.S.-Saudi diplomatic relationship. (and freedom was lost forever)
1949 - The Knesset (Israeli parliament) first convenes. (And the hope of freedom… died)
1962 - First Lady Jacqueline Kennedy takes television viewers on a tour of the White House. (and the entire world is supposed to care!)
1966 - The Irish Institute in Mexico City is founded by Fr. Marcial Maciel (and so… in time… one of my friends was rapped)
1989 - Iranian leader Ruhollah Khomeini issues a fatwa encouraging Muslims to kill the author of The Satanic Verses, Salman Rushdie. (com’on world!)
1989 - The first of 24 satellites of the Global Positioning System is placed into orbit. (told ya… no freedom!)
2004 - In a suburb of Moscow, Russia, the roof of the Transvaal water park collapses, killing more than 25 people, and wounding more than 100 others. (I was
shopping for your Valentine’s day present with my mom and all of the sudden she was dead under tons of concrete… I guess I can’t make it to your place!
(Love and the Russian winter))
2005 - Lebanon's former Prime Minister, Rafik Hariri, is assassinated, prompting the Cedar Revolution (Intifada of Independence). (Poor Lebanon)
2005 - Seven people were killed and 151 wounded in a series of bombings by suspected Al-Qaeda-linked militants that hit the Philippines' Makati financial district in Metro Manila, Davao City, and General Santos City. (No Mexicans were injured)2006 - chip and PIN - UK cardholders had to use their PIN to be sure they could pay with their chip and PIN card. This change was made to better protect cardholders against fraudsters. (They just want to spend their bloody money!)
Some people has also been born on this day... Parents believe this is a proof that Adonai likes us to celebrate love on this day... but I think different and so do other people.
1913 - Jimmy Hoffa, American labor union leader (disappeared 1975) (Exhibit A)
1942 - Michael Bloomberg, Mayor of New York City (Exhibit B)
1942 - Ricardo Rodríguez, Mexican racing driver (d. 1962) (Exhibit C + jerk)
1948 - Teller, American magician (Penn and Teller) (Jerk + Exhibit D)
1972 - Rob Thomas, American musician (matchbox twenty) (Papi Exhibit E)1974 - Filippa Giordano, Italian singer (Mami Exhibit F)
Some people also die this day; they obviously did not love anybody, who wants to make people cry on this day? Like it is not enough! (Some people love themselves so much (and had the guts as well), they decided to send the source of their unhappiness to the grave)
Deaths
1317 - Marguerite of France, queen of Edward I of England (b. 1282) (He wanted a new wife)
1400 - King Richard II of England (murdered) (b. 1367) (he was tightfisted)
1405 - Timur, Mongol conqueror (b. 1336) (He murdered a lot of people)
1523 - Pope Adrian VI (he was a pope)
1571 - Odet de Coligny, French cardinal and Protestant (b. 1517) (He was a cardinal)
1714 - Maria Luisa of Savoy, Queen Consort of Spain (b. 1688) (She didn’t want to have sex with the king!)
1779 - James Cook, British naval captain and explorer (b. 1728) (He was wearing tights)
1831 - Vicente Guerrero, Mexican revolutionary hero (b. 1782) (He was himself)
1894 - Eugène Charles Catalan, Belgian mathematician (b. 1814) (He liked math)
1943 - Dora Gerson, German actress, cabaret singer, and Holocaust victim (b. 1899) (Actress, singer, holocaust victim… is your bell ringing?)
1943 - David Hilbert, German mathematician (b. 1862) (He also like math)
1949 - Yusuf Salman Yusuf, Iraqi-Assyrian communist leader (b. 1901) (He had the name Yusuf twice)
1959 - Baby Dodds, American jazz drummer (b. 1898) (His neighbor didn’t like drums)
1969 - Vito Genovese, American gangster (b. 1897) (He was a gangster)
1970 - Herbert Strudwick, English cricketer (b. 1880). (He played cricket)
1974 - Stewie Dempster, New Zealand cricketer (b. 1903) (He played cricket as well)
1989 - James Bond, American ornithologist (b. 1900) (He was a spy, he implanted cameras on birds)
1994 - Andrei Chikatilo, Russian serial killer (executed) (b. 1936) (He killed for a hobby)
2002 - Nándor Hidegkuti, Hungarian footballer (b. 1922) (My dog’s Hungarian)
2003 - Dolly the sheep, first cloned mammal (b. 1996) (good bye Dolly!)
2005 - Rafik Hariri, Lebanese politician and billionaire businessman (b. 1944) (He should’ve been born in Mexico)
And sometimes we all forget about the greatest of them all… the love of God, no matter time or place we have always been loved!
Events
1349 - Approximately 2,000 Jews were burned to death by mobs in Strasbourg and expelled from the city. (I do respect people, not Jews or Muslims or Catholics because from the outside is hard to get… get it?)
1779 - James Cook was killed by Native Hawaiians near Kealakekua on the Island of Hawaii. (He took away their innocence!)
1835 - The original Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, is formed in Kirtland, Ohio. (Good lord!)
1876 - Alexander Graham Bell applies for a patent for the telephone, as does Elisha Gray. (Carlos Slim says thank you!)
1879 - The War of the Pacific breaks out when Chilean armed forces occupy the Bolivian port city of Antofagasta. (it’s true!)
1895 - First performance of Oscar Wilde's last play The Importance of Being Earnest at the St James's Theatre in London. (Go Oscar… then suffer!)
1900 - Russia responds to international pressure to free Finland by tightening imperial control over the country. (Reason why Finland vodka is not as good as it should be had they stayed Russian… but they are first world now… go figure)
1918 - Tarzan of the Apes, the first movie featuring Edgar Rice Burroughs' Tarzan character, is released. (ever wonder why the jungle is endangered?)
1918 - The Soviet Union adopts the Gregorian calendar (1 February according to the Julian calendar). (weakness)
1920 - The League of Women Voters is founded in Chicago, Illinois. (Jesus! Joseph! and…)
1924 - The International Business Machines Corporation (IBM) is founded. (Let’s go GLOBAL)
1929 - St. Valentine's Day Massacre: Seven gangster rivals of Al Capone are murdered in Chicago, Illinois. (it’s all said and yes, done)
1945 - President Franklin D. Roosevelt meets with King Ibn Saud of Saudi Arabia aboard the USS Quincy, officially starting the U.S.-Saudi diplomatic relationship. (and freedom was lost forever)
1949 - The Knesset (Israeli parliament) first convenes. (And the hope of freedom… died)
1962 - First Lady Jacqueline Kennedy takes television viewers on a tour of the White House. (and the entire world is supposed to care!)
1966 - The Irish Institute in Mexico City is founded by Fr. Marcial Maciel (and so… in time… one of my friends was rapped)
1989 - Iranian leader Ruhollah Khomeini issues a fatwa encouraging Muslims to kill the author of The Satanic Verses, Salman Rushdie. (com’on world!)
1989 - The first of 24 satellites of the Global Positioning System is placed into orbit. (told ya… no freedom!)
2004 - In a suburb of Moscow, Russia, the roof of the Transvaal water park collapses, killing more than 25 people, and wounding more than 100 others. (I was
shopping for your Valentine’s day present with my mom and all of the sudden she was dead under tons of concrete… I guess I can’t make it to your place!
(Love and the Russian winter))
2005 - Lebanon's former Prime Minister, Rafik Hariri, is assassinated, prompting the Cedar Revolution (Intifada of Independence). (Poor Lebanon)
2005 - Seven people were killed and 151 wounded in a series of bombings by suspected Al-Qaeda-linked militants that hit the Philippines' Makati financial district in Metro Manila, Davao City, and General Santos City. (No Mexicans were injured)2006 - chip and PIN - UK cardholders had to use their PIN to be sure they could pay with their chip and PIN card. This change was made to better protect cardholders against fraudsters. (They just want to spend their bloody money!)
Some people has also been born on this day... Parents believe this is a proof that Adonai likes us to celebrate love on this day... but I think different and so do other people.
1913 - Jimmy Hoffa, American labor union leader (disappeared 1975) (Exhibit A)
1942 - Michael Bloomberg, Mayor of New York City (Exhibit B)
1942 - Ricardo Rodríguez, Mexican racing driver (d. 1962) (Exhibit C + jerk)
1948 - Teller, American magician (Penn and Teller) (Jerk + Exhibit D)
1972 - Rob Thomas, American musician (matchbox twenty) (Papi Exhibit E)1974 - Filippa Giordano, Italian singer (Mami Exhibit F)
Some people also die this day; they obviously did not love anybody, who wants to make people cry on this day? Like it is not enough! (Some people love themselves so much (and had the guts as well), they decided to send the source of their unhappiness to the grave)
Deaths
1317 - Marguerite of France, queen of Edward I of England (b. 1282) (He wanted a new wife)
1400 - King Richard II of England (murdered) (b. 1367) (he was tightfisted)
1405 - Timur, Mongol conqueror (b. 1336) (He murdered a lot of people)
1523 - Pope Adrian VI (he was a pope)
1571 - Odet de Coligny, French cardinal and Protestant (b. 1517) (He was a cardinal)
1714 - Maria Luisa of Savoy, Queen Consort of Spain (b. 1688) (She didn’t want to have sex with the king!)
1779 - James Cook, British naval captain and explorer (b. 1728) (He was wearing tights)
1831 - Vicente Guerrero, Mexican revolutionary hero (b. 1782) (He was himself)
1894 - Eugène Charles Catalan, Belgian mathematician (b. 1814) (He liked math)
1943 - Dora Gerson, German actress, cabaret singer, and Holocaust victim (b. 1899) (Actress, singer, holocaust victim… is your bell ringing?)
1943 - David Hilbert, German mathematician (b. 1862) (He also like math)
1949 - Yusuf Salman Yusuf, Iraqi-Assyrian communist leader (b. 1901) (He had the name Yusuf twice)
1959 - Baby Dodds, American jazz drummer (b. 1898) (His neighbor didn’t like drums)
1969 - Vito Genovese, American gangster (b. 1897) (He was a gangster)
1970 - Herbert Strudwick, English cricketer (b. 1880). (He played cricket)
1974 - Stewie Dempster, New Zealand cricketer (b. 1903) (He played cricket as well)
1989 - James Bond, American ornithologist (b. 1900) (He was a spy, he implanted cameras on birds)
1994 - Andrei Chikatilo, Russian serial killer (executed) (b. 1936) (He killed for a hobby)
2002 - Nándor Hidegkuti, Hungarian footballer (b. 1922) (My dog’s Hungarian)
2003 - Dolly the sheep, first cloned mammal (b. 1996) (good bye Dolly!)
2005 - Rafik Hariri, Lebanese politician and billionaire businessman (b. 1944) (He should’ve been born in Mexico)
And sometimes we all forget about the greatest of them all… the love of God, no matter time or place we have always been loved!
Jan 20, 2007
My little island
It's been a while and I know you missed me, but there has been a lot going on and my ADD is getting worse... I am still in Cabo San Lucas, enjoying the nice and the shity weather.
2006 was the year of the dog, and so it was my year; last night I was talking to a sweet lady from Pasadena CA, she is a dog as well and as all californians she is half mexican and half chinese, so she was happy to meet another dog (I am two litters behind though). We had a great dinner last night and she would not stop talking, she is a writer and something really got my attantion, she was talking about the Guerlain spa at the hotel I am with, and that it smells like Shalimar, and so did she. Well this properties also smell like that, I could not get enough of getting closer to smell her (is this odd?).
The the wine kept flowing and so we got into politics, we came out with a resolution, and I am seriuos about it, and so were the nice bunch we had for dinner: California, Baja California and Baja California Sur, should tell the US and Mexico, It was very nice, thanks, I am independent now.
A) Most of us are already bilingual.
B) Per Capita Income is outdreagous.
C) Ocean, Mountains, Minerals, Agriculture, Tourism.
D) I could legally run for Grand Marshall for the LA Pride Parade.
E) Our unique cultural baggage includes the Pericues Indians and Terminator.
F) Density is 7 inhabitants per Km2.
G) Gay friendly.
Not likely to happen, but oh boy! It was fun.
The hotel I am with is walking the rocky path. I am not happy about it and It is making my performace a bad one.
My kitten (formerly know as Irma) is not a girl, his name is now Teddy and he is a needy joy.
India, the older one, run away from home and she came back after two days, chances are she is pregnant.
I want to visit San Francisco soon and I wonder when.
You can call me Matthieu.
2006 was the year of the dog, and so it was my year; last night I was talking to a sweet lady from Pasadena CA, she is a dog as well and as all californians she is half mexican and half chinese, so she was happy to meet another dog (I am two litters behind though). We had a great dinner last night and she would not stop talking, she is a writer and something really got my attantion, she was talking about the Guerlain spa at the hotel I am with, and that it smells like Shalimar, and so did she. Well this properties also smell like that, I could not get enough of getting closer to smell her (is this odd?).
The the wine kept flowing and so we got into politics, we came out with a resolution, and I am seriuos about it, and so were the nice bunch we had for dinner: California, Baja California and Baja California Sur, should tell the US and Mexico, It was very nice, thanks, I am independent now.
A) Most of us are already bilingual.
B) Per Capita Income is outdreagous.
C) Ocean, Mountains, Minerals, Agriculture, Tourism.
D) I could legally run for Grand Marshall for the LA Pride Parade.
E) Our unique cultural baggage includes the Pericues Indians and Terminator.
F) Density is 7 inhabitants per Km2.
G) Gay friendly.
Not likely to happen, but oh boy! It was fun.
The hotel I am with is walking the rocky path. I am not happy about it and It is making my performace a bad one.
My kitten (formerly know as Irma) is not a girl, his name is now Teddy and he is a needy joy.
India, the older one, run away from home and she came back after two days, chances are she is pregnant.
I want to visit San Francisco soon and I wonder when.
You can call me Matthieu.
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